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Saturday, February 27, 2010

Floss Or Die


I have a confession. I am certain that I am not alone in this admission of guilt and that is why I feel safe enough to share it.

I hate flossing. I really am talking complete disdain. I try and justify not flossing to myself with these statements (not spoken aloud for the most part…)

  1. I’m too tired.
  2. I will floss in the morning.
  3. What’s it gonna matter if I miss ONE night?!

Ok. Here’s the part where I become a total hypocrite. I am a flossing Nazi when it comes to my kids! I am militant about them flossing. Why? Because I want them to have healthy teeth that will last them a lifetime. I don’t want them to have any dental problems what-so-ever. Why? Because I have had issues with teeth that I wouldn’t wish on anyone. Why? Because of not flossing.

Can you see the tangled web of insanity?

Let’s just tackle my 3 excuses.

  1. “I’m too tired.” – Yes. This is true. I believe moms live in a constant state of “I’m tired.” But here’s the thing: I will spend a good 40 minutes on caring for my face, because God forbid I get a wrinkle or a blemish. Masks, scrubs, toners, eye creams, anti-aging whatever, right?! By the time I finish my skin care routine, It’s almost morning. So, why then, can’t I embrace another 2 minutes to floss the things that not only have great purpose in my life, but are probably one of the first things people notice when they meet you. Teeth, baby. Teeth are important.
  2. “I will floss in the morning.” – No I won’t. I know it. You know it. It’s a morsel of deceit I’m trying to feed myself. Kind of like setting my clock ahead so that I’m not late. Yeah. Still late.
  3. “What’s it gonna matter if I miss ONE night?!” – Ok, so, on the times when I DO floss….stuff is found. Like…food. Gross. Basically, that food that would be fished out by flossing at night is still there in the morning. There is not a fairy to take that away. And…let’s be painfully honest, rotten food smells. That makes me gag.

As most of my blogs go, I have no real point. No moral of the story. No words of wisdom. All those things are left up to the reader. I am merely on a transparent journey of self-discovery and growth.

(Subliminal message: FLOSS OR DIE!)

Have a nice day.